can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
