Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.