Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
