IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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