Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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