The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
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