I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
