Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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