That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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