is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
