Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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