best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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