Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
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I have surprise drugs for everyone
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
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The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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