seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
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I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
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We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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