oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
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I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
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I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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