I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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