we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I need water and some morals
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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