dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I puked a lego.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
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