YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
vagina is talking i cant
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize