I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.