your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
