tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
