no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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