we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I will pee on everything he values.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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