we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
