I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
