I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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