Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize