So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
