yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize