When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
