I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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