it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize