3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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