No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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