were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
