The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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