i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
