i just had sex bonerless
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
