It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
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