we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
