I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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