Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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