I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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