hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
