did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
