I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
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Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
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You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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