it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I think im going to throw up on grandma
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
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