Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.

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  (517): yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox. http://tfl.nu/4oix
  Replies (4) Good night (659) Bad night (816)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...

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  (816): FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine... http://tfl.nu/7ts7
  Replies (53) Good night (862) Bad night (3649)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.

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  (720): I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower. http://tfl.nu/yzkb
  Replies (44) Good night (12335) Bad night (1143)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?

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  (203): Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook? http://tfl.nu/084o
  Replies (16) Good night (3956) Bad night (1993)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.

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  (219): she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade. http://tfl.nu/8ipj
  Replies (11) Good night (3510) Bad night (1592)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.

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  (413): My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that. http://tfl.nu/auq5
  Replies (15) Good night (960) Bad night (5757)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard

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  (717): But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard http://tfl.nu/v6zl
  Replies (4) Good night (1092) Bad night (1512)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...

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  (423): Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight... http://tfl.nu/fo5y
  Replies (11) Good night (1617) Bad night (838)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.

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  (810): I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/qnr4
  Replies (6) Good night (665) Bad night (1594)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?

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  (416): Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best? http://tfl.nu/9x4p
  Replies (0) Good night (752) Bad night (330)
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  (916): View more from California

  You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.

  (1-916): View more from California

  No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.

  (916): View more from California

  YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN

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  (916): You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier. (1-916): No, it's okay because this is the city of trees. (916): YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN http://tfl.nu/hcly
  Replies (8) Good night (784) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss

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  (316): I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss http://tfl.nu/1mn2
  Replies (3) Good night (363) Bad night (673)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.

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  (519): Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom. http://tfl.nu/2pht
  Replies (3) Good night (1130) Bad night (293)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?

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  (908): He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven? http://tfl.nu/a24b
  Replies (3) Good night (274) Bad night (598)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.

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  (404): I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors. http://tfl.nu/geij
  Replies (2) Good night (880) Bad night (199)

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