How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Randomize
