I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
just found out that she named her cat after me.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
